19?

 Oh Hi!

19 years old…

Gimana si rasannya jadi dewasa yg sesungguhnya? Nothing special for today, kayak biasa hampir semua orang ngucapin tapi nggak dengan 1 orang yang bener-bener aku tunggu, just likes taylor swift song , 

“We're happy free confused and lonely at the same time” — 22 

I’m tryin to run away , again and again samaa kaya tahun-tahun kemarin , semakin kesini semakin sadar, kebahagiaan yang aku taruh di satu oranng yang mendapatkan feedback yang sama tapi jauh lebih buruk. Ga minta apapun di tahun ini , cuma jauhkan dari orang orang yang ga peduli ttng kita , dan smoga bahagia di hari hari berikutnya.

No cakes , no presents , nothing special. Gak tau apa yang di harus di banggain sama umur yang mulai bertambah, kematian yang semakin mendekat ini. 

But all over i want a chocolate cakes for today that’s all. For my presents? Maybe.. i hope to meet someone who know how to treat me better than before. 

I want my parents always healty and happys..

Terus berenang terus berenang. 🐡

I’am deserve happiness.

And I mean real happiness, true happiness. The kind of happiness that makes your heart fill with warmth.

And I deserve to feel what it feels like to be okay. To feel like the world isn't against you. To feel like you aren't constantly treading water just to keep from drowning. More than anything.

you deserve to be okay.

And I know it's hard to hear this, especially when you are so sad. Especially when you are so far away from loving yourself. But I still want you to know. Because one day, you are going to feel okay again. One day you are going to feel happy again. It's just a matter of time.